I AM FLY PAPER FOR FREAKS

Just thought I'd let you all in on a little messed up email converstion that happened recently. I think I must give off some sort of funky vibe, because this has been the most fucked up week as far as sketchy inter personal relations go. I've changed names (OR HAVE I?) to protect the innocent.


Hey ,

I now have a studio at my basement, and I could use someone to do lots of> > > producing/sound editing/voicing Let me know if you are interested in unsupervied work for the experience of it-Frank

Quoting me: It would actually be fantastic because I'm searching for some way to make a demo for myself. Let me know whenever, though I am busy, and we'll chat>

FRANK. wrote:> > Hi > >> > My number is 384-*****. call me tonight at 8 pm, and we can discuss the> > details.> > If you can a car, come on over, and you can see the studio for yourself,> and> > maybe we can arrange for you to be there when I am out.> >> > -F>
Quoting me :>> > Hey Frank,> >> > I have a class tonite until ten of ten. Could I ring you tomorrow
FRANK wrote:>> Tomorrow night, same time, 8 pm.> -F

FRANK wrote
It’s 8 :20…WHERE are you?

Quoting me:
As much as I appreciate the offer...I think I'll pass...I don't appreciate your tone. At all.
I had an audition last night and didn't get home until after midnight...My phone was practically dead and my boyfriend was a much more important phone call.

FRANK wrote:Hey You have a great voice, and so much potential, but I can see why you have not advanced to where you should be. Other people might be to intimidated to tell you what you need to hear, even if you don't want to hear it. Go ahead and be pissed off. That's ok. If you don't know it now, you will come to it later,the realization, that deep down inside, you have enough talent to know I am right.> ...Tone?...Do you always sabotage your own career like this?That's ok. I don't appreciate scheduling time for a call (a time Yourequested)and having my time wasted. I had arranged for you to get paid tutoring on sound editing software Wavelab (out of my own pocket) for theinternship, a guarenty that it would air on at least 1 FM station in Vancouver,and at least 3 internet stations. You blew it.>.You asked for a date and time, and you screwed up on your scheduling. That is your problem. You made it my problem. Those excuses may work in other areas ofyour life, but in this industry, with me, those excuses are a dime a dozen. Don't project your irresponsiblity into the "tone" of others because you cannot get it together. Your low self esteem has no business in your careerbuilding.-Frank

Hey Frank,
Um career? I think you have me mistaken with someone else. I have absolutely no intention of pursuing a CAREER in radio. So instead of making comments about something you know nothing about, namely me, perhaps in the future you will ask questions instead of barking orders.
And you arranged WHAT?!?! Did I ask you to do that? And now your pissed and feel like hurling insults...fine, but before you tell me what I blew or what I sabotaged, perhaps you should have asked what My intentions for MYself were. Last time I checked, you weren't the one responsible for my career; in fact you haven't even said BOO to me in like four or five months and now, what, JUMP? Worry about your own 'career' bitterness, you obviously need to.
Maybe invest in some Yoga classes.
The comments you made here are uninformed and knee jerk, so you'll pardon me if I don't take you at all seriously. Me and my low self-esteem are going to go get a coffee now and ponder my extreme talent.


OKAY...AM I crazy or is this guy probably building bombs in his basement as well? Why does every Tom, Dick and Dickhead think they're important cause they have an internet radio station? Yippee. I'm pretty sure I caught an episode of Aunt Mary's Community Bake Sale Radio last week...the nuts were not just in the recipes, if you know what I'm saying.

DON'T RUN!!! FINKS!! ALL OF YOU!!!

People are finks. The more I read about or hear stories of people lying and cheating, the more I would like to throw in the proverbial towel. It is completely draining to have to listen to friends talk about their finkish behaviour and truly disturbing to see how little it seems to bother them. Plus you get to thinking if you could possibly be the victim of some such fink yourself.
I'm no Preachy Patricia (Doppleganger of Patricia the Stripper) and I'm all for liberation, sexual or otherwise, but have I gone completely MAD?
Marriage, right? Have and hold, richer and poorer, sickness and health, blah, blah, blah. Maybe they should have included something about boredom and excitement. It seems to me most of what my lying fink friends have in common is that they are bored with their current partner or spouse. They say they LOVE their significant others but for some significant reason or other have lost the spark that they once had. Guess we are all just thrill seeking cousins of the ape, then, because I thought people had the forethought enough to anticipate this eventuality and LIVE WITH IT. Everything can't be all good all the time. And for fuck sake why do people want it to? That's having your cake, eating it and not paying a cent for the ingredients!
Why do finks suddenly appear everytime marriage is near? Sure there are people for whom marriage is a cozy little greenhouse, but for the most part it's a ceremony with very little impact on the partners' responisibility guage. The words don't mean diddly to most people. Just words, just promises, easily broken. People say it's human nature. CRAP! Human nature should be something that capitalises on our ability to think ahead, empathise, explain. Those are, after all, human characteristics. When people say human nature, what they mean is ANIMAL nature. Plus, it's a godamned cop out. It says that the finks of the world can't help themselves, and well, maybe, shouldn't have to. I get that we may not be designed for monogamy. Men, biologically at least, are said to look for several mates for whom to act as seed receptors, whereas women tend to jones for the one mate deal. O.K.. We also used to shit in holes in the woods and clobber each other with truncated tree limbs (that is before we invented the wheel and then could run each other over).
But so then why marriage? Did you just want to wear a pretty dress and have a party, because it's much cheaper and relatively easy to declare some Friday night your own personal holiday and booze it up in a tiara. At least then it's not a foregone conclusion who you are going to be sleeping with that evening. Makes it a little more exciting.
Or maybe you're married because you are traditional, as one particular fellow explained to me, with his hand on my bare knee. These finks are particularly offputting and some (like this particular one) even go as far as to say cheating saves marriages. BOLLOCKS!!! How can you not rot on the insides knowing you are doing the dirty on someone you supposedly love? If you can't or don't rot, then there is something seriously WRONG.
This is where the danger lies. It's a sort of desensitisation to our moral compass.. If you make yourself not care, either cause 'every body's doin it' or you reason that you aren't doing any harm, don't you eventually numb the responisibilty right outta your system, teach yourself it's actually okay? It ceases to exist then, doesn't it? We might actually be de-evolving! Think of it...Our brains are powerful little super computers that carry great influence....what if we end up passing on an underdeveloped moral sense to our next generation? We all hear of some freaks that are born without the sense of right and wrong, people who end up killing and end up in mental wards; why not people born with no loyalty?
Of course I'm being facetious, but I worry about people who say there is nothing wrong with finkdom. It's a convenient way to reason selfishness and it doesn't admit what is really going on. What is going on is essentially the expression of our crippling fear of being alone and unimportant. Which of course is all about our fear of death.
What really gets my beehive in a buzz is that the finks think only of themselves, not the new world disorder they are chain reacting with their indiscretions. With all they're protests that it cannot be wrong to feel so good, what IS it they propose? Every body screwing every body? Free love? Okay then, sounds good...I'll have some of that! Tricky thing to manoever though, when that pesky HUMAN NATURE comes into it. Ya know? My favorites are jealousy, rage, gluttony...

BREAKING POINT- THE CBC DOCUMENTARY THAT MADE ME CRY LIKE A CHILD

After the frustration of having to try and explain my contradictory feelings last night about the 1995 referendum in Québec to my boyfriend, who hails from Jolly Ole England, I went to bed. I was feeling very confused. Of course he was right; one second I'm cursing any muther who has the cojones to try and break up my kick-ass country and then the next I'm expressing a preternatural understanding of why Montréal Francophones wanted to strangle the maple leaves off the 'we love you Québec' protesters/well wishers from across Canada come to save our souls. What the hell was my problem?
Maybe it's because I think I understand a little of what drives the Separatist movement. Maybe 'understand' is a little strong, but I suppose I empathise with the fear of having one's culture slowly crushed by a more dominant or influencial one. Try being an Anglo where I live in Montréal. (Not that there's anything wrong with it...)
Not that I actually believe, as some clearly do, that Québecois culture is as weak and without defence as to require such grand protection. It is not, let's just say, as vulnerable as First Nations culture, by any means. We've really fucked them!
I mean, Québec culture has some pretty powerful and deep pocketed white-hairs running the show to make sure they don't go the way of the Dodo. Plus, as far as I can see the biggest threat to Québecois culture is the United States of America, not Enlgish Canada. I find it absurd that these little renegade 'patriotes' (small fucking p) running around Montréal with their flags and reminiscing about the Plains of Abraham are the same kids I see wearing Von Bitch t-shirts. The kids with the OUI patches still stuck to their backpacks are listening to maudite Britney Spears not Beau Dommage!

Hey, listen up, it's not YOUR culture in danger...it's ALL culture in danger!

Should we not be working on this (gasp) together? Yah. Just as soon as we stop hating each others' guts, I guess, right?